I’m not even on the eve of parenthood, there is still a good few months to go before our (hopeful) bundle of joy joins us in the world. Regardless – I feel like it’s happening tomorrow. Quite unexpectedly, I’m feeling the pressure of getting prepared…
Now, I’m not stupid. I have friends with children, I work with loads of mums and I have the Internet so I know baby’s need stuff. But as a newbie on the parent circuit, it’s quite overwhelming. We decided to go and look at some “essentials” this weekend – buggies, car seats, cots etc. After a matter of minutes in MotherCare, we were quite literally lost in a sea of rompers and ISO-fix bases. We left empty handed, unexpectedly exhausted and feeling really deflated. I’m fully prepared for the responsibility of having a baby, but tackling MotherCare, that’s another beast all together! After our first skirmish, we decided to make a list of stuff we really needed (taking advice from others) and a list of stuff we want. Two very different things as it turns out.
We started budgeting and thinking about how much money we are going to need when we found out we were expecting. To be honest, having just got married, saving isn’t something new so hopefully it won’t be too straining. The thing is, how do you know how much to put away? My wife is hoping to have 9-12months off work and obviously we need to buy the aforementioned “stuff” we need/want, but how much is enough? Simply, we can’t see into the future – I know a lot depends on what you do with your newborn etc. but as a first timer (and absolute control freak) it’s quite unsettling not knowing!
Now this isn’t something that I had thought about really. That’s a lie, I took for granted that we would do them, but I never really thought about what they might consist of. I (like most expectant fathers) can guarantee I will be the best dad I can be. However, being in a room with 10 other couples being taught to do baby stuff really, really scares me. Maybe it’s thought of the unknown, maybe it’s insecurity or maybe I’m just being soft…whatever it is, I’m not looking toward to NCT.
I love our house. It’s mint – nothing fancy, a 2 up 2 down Victorian terrace. Since finding out my wife is pregnant, I have started going a bit wild with the DIY. I have heard of “preparing the nest” and all that – but I wasn’t expecting it from me! With the baby on the way, I have started sanding down the skirting boards and resealing them and painting them, renovating the cupboard to incorporate more shelf space…it’s almost impulsive! My subconscious suddenly panicked inside voice seems to be telling me “it’s coming!” but we still have ages.
I had to take a step back today, because I feel like I’m getting too caught up in all of the silly intricacies and pressures which are still almost irrelevant – yes the baby is on the way, yes things will need sorting but no, they don’t all need to be done yesterday. This weekend I’m going to focus on enjoying some time off with my beautiful wife and our lovely bump.