Not being the one with the baby actually in you is tough. By saying that I know I’m going to get stick from my wife! While your partner goes through all of the “emotions” (you know what I mean) of carrying the baby, us dads are kind of left guessing about a lot of things.
Straight up, mums do all the hard work. Biologically, mentally, physically we all know pregnancy is draining for women. As a man, we kind of just watch and in most cases (awkwardly) help when and where we can. I have got to admit though it’s quite hard knowing what to do and when.
As a dad it’s easy to feel like you’re not really doing much right. Me and my wife are only 17 weeks into our pregnancy journey and I have been met – frequently – with the “you don’t understand!!” special on a number of occasions.
The truth is, I don’t. I’m a geek, I like reading books and looking stuff up – I want to be a good dad and I think that starts way before the birth. I find myself wanting to know what’s happening in my wife’s body and I try to understand by reading things about it…the problem is, that isn’t really too helpful. It helps me sympathise with her but as it turns out, is dads simply can’t empathise with our pregnant partners and no matter how hard we try, we can’t put ourselves in their shoes.
What I’ve learnt most during these early stages of pregnancy is that I need to listen to my partner and not try too hard to analyse things too much. Already, I have a huge sense of pride when I think about what she is doing everyday. So when I say not being the one to carry the baby is tough, what I really mean is not being able to help your baby’s mum with the pregnancy is tough.
Shit, we haven’t even got to the birth yet!!