Mum bloggers are prolific online and with the rise of vlogs and blogs, there has been a growing increase in content about parenting.
Since I started writing a few years ago, I’ve noticed an increase in dads sharing their stories, advice and journeys, which is great – especially when it comes to opening up about their emotions and talking about male mental health; a topic close to my heart.
But although us dads are more visible, we only have a small market share, and I have witnessed the response from mums is, at times, somewhat less warm.
It’s not always easy sharing, especially in such a female dominated area, and especially when the reaction isn’t always positive.
Being a dad in a mum’s world is tough.
Too many times, I have written and read articles voicing what it’s truly like to be a dad, and they have been belittled by others. In fact, the likeliness is by even raising this whole feeling of disparity in this piece, there will be some stigma and backlash, which in itself is ironic I suppose.
In a time in which social media and the internet play such a key role in supporting and educating people about parenting, it baffles me that there is such inequality between mums and dads.
I’m not saying that I’m scared to talk about parenting issues in my articles, it’s just I’m more aware of what I’m writing and I know if I say I’ve had a hard time as a dad (which is difficult to admit in itself), I know I’m going to get an onslaught of ‘try being a woman’ comments.
One topic that seems to be particularly sacred is birth. My wife did EVERYTHING to deliver our baby, she was amazing, but any time I’ve even mentioned my feelings as a dad, there has been repeated negativity from mums – not all mums let me add – but enough to make me think twice about wanting to talk about my birth experiences as a dad.
It’s something I’ve noticed is prevalent in real (non-internet) life too. So many times I’ve heard new dads saying “I’m tired” and they are quickly met with, “you’ve not done anything!” Again, it may not seem much, but it’s enough to stop dads from wanting to talk about being a parent, and in turn I think it can have a really negative effect on male mental health.
In a day and age where we strive for equality, maybe it’s time to promote parenting as something that takes two. If you’ve been brave enough to share anything as a dad, I salute you. We need to talk, we need to be encouraged to talk and we need to remove any stigma around talking about being a dad. It’s tough being a dad in a mum’s world!